A mothers whimsy: tales from the munchkin parade

Every time I say the word "disgusting" around my 17 month old he sticks his finger up his nose and laughs. That is because I am constantly saying "that is disgusting" when my 3 1/2 year old sticks his finger up his nose. I just can't win! The baby thinks everything his older brother does is hysterical and worth copying. That includes belly farts, which he is quite good at giving. He loves walking around the kitchen picking up cheerios flung the day before and eating them. I have to constantly sweep up his mess so I don't have to get grossed out by both the mess and his eating off the floor. It is not like we are starving him or anything. He is in a size 3T....

I love when they grab the musical instruments and start playing them-though lately a lot of the instruments seem to be come "Fire shooting sticks" for my older son. They are really cute playing the little crocodile piano and the bongos. The baby has this cool looking dr. seuss musical instrument like toy that he loves to blow into, his brother will march around with the tin whistle (this also becomes a fire shooting stick). They like doing this at around 6:30am, very loudly.

The best is in the morning when he rolls over and says "mama, mama- swack swack swack" three juicy kisses on my cheek. His brother who sleeps between his daddy and I also rolls over and buries his hands in my hair he will say "I want to snuggle up with you mamma" before he gets out of bed in search of his father who always has a glass of milk ready.

Today was Pajama Day at school for the 3 1/2 year old (I am going to have to think of unreal code names for them soon this number thing is a pain). Pay 5 bucks to the leukemia fund and you get to walk around in PJ's all day. It is a great idea, the kids had a blast, plus they had pancake breakfast. He also announced on the car ride home that he likes donuts, especially "munchins". (Not a typo he just calls them that.)

Morning Crazies

What kind of crazy life do you lead?

Here is my Tuesday and let me know what you think.

Got up after nursing the baby around 6:45
(my husband had been up since 5:30 got the baby a bottle, started lunch prep, and tried to feed the baby,took a shower and left by 7:10am)

I took my shower while playing peekaboo with the baby, I got dressed back in my pj's cuz I have learned not to get into my work clothing until after I have everyones teeth brushed. I got the baby changed and dressed, fed my three year old, and ate my breakfast w/ the baby.

It is now 7:15 am. I filled out the form for daycare, let the baby practice sitting on the potty, let him fling tupperware all over the kitchen while I emptied the dishwasher, prepped my lunch, changed the babies diaper again(poop this time)

It is now 7:30 time to start working on the three year old to get him dressed. He picked out which batman underwear he wanted to wear, fought me over the shirt and finally put his pants and socks on. We then played dragons w/ sock puppets on both children, finally took vitamins and brushed teeth....it is now 7:45am.

I got both kids downstairs, got their jackets on, hats, shoes, mittens, warmed up the car threw out the garbage, cleaned up the tupperwear, wiped down the counters, let my older son play with his trains and finally -finally got them into their car seats. I was out the door by 8:08 and left daycare by 8:38am. By the time I walked into my office at 9 am I was EXHAUSTED! But what a great morning we had!!!

white bar to blue circle

What a beautiful afternoon for a quick hike in Harriman. I went on the white bar trail at the end of Johnstontown Rd. The hike was spontaneous and a different route. I left around 2:50pm so it was kind of blue grey and cold. I was a little nervous hiking alone at this time especially because I was going into the woods instead of staying on the wider trail. I hiked along the rocks and crossed over a partly frozen stream, thought about hibernating bears and said to hell with it why bother turning back. Last weekend a girl got lost hiking in the woods and she wasn't found until about 1 in the morning-I certainly did not want to be in her shoes. But I wasn't ready to turn around and give up. I wanted to see where this path would lead me.

The hike was spectacular. I went up on some ice covered rocks onto a rock out cropping. I climbed to the top and could see the Reeves Meadow parking lot. The sky was so pretty with thinning white clouds a bit of blue amidst the gray and dark blue mountains in the distance. It was very cold, but worth the walk. I would've gone further, but it was getting late and dark. I still had to be able to see the white bars on the tree to get back to the car. I was back by four.

Thank goodness for Harriman!

A post whilst nursing

I have been slacking on the post-even my weekly poetry blogging may be forced to become monthly...I haven't had a moment to myself. Right now I am posting while nursing. Difficult, but not impossible to do.

Today at work I assisted during the sonos for women getting abortions. This was interesting and difficult. You have to view the products of conception after the procedure to make sure the MD got the entire fetus and sac out. When the fetus is about 11 weeks or so you can really see a lot but it is all about the size of a thumb nail. Like a little alien. I think it would be difficult work to sift thru the products everyday. I guess that is why it is only done once a week at the facility I was at. I am certainly pro choice and think it is up to every woman to decide what she will do. I am also glad these women were all offered birth control upon leaving.

On another note I discovered that the baby loves the Sex Pistols-especially the anarchy song. He gets a real kick out it. He loves bouncing around in his booster seat eating and listening to music. Other favs include: "happy birthday", and "frosty the snowman" with his big brother. The big guy currently forces us to listen to Feliz Navidad by El Vez while running around singing it at the top of his lungs. I wish the christmas cds would get put away already!

That is about it, oh except that I miss my best friend and wish she could be here for her 40th birthday with all her east coast buddies!

Letters I never wrote

For years especially as a child I dictated letters in my head to people who really did something that meant a lot to me. Writers who I loved, musicians, artists,etc. I never actually sat down and wrote these thank you notes, but I meant to. As a child I was filled with this great sense of wonderment over certain things other people did and I wanted to thank them for it. I have always regretted not writing these letters.

Today, while driving in my car alone I was spacing out and I realized I was actually writing a letter in my head to someone I wanted to thank. I lamented the fact that I would never have the time to sit and actually write the letter and I realized. "Dummy! you have a blog, you don't have to write it and mail it out." (I am a lazy procrastinator that way.) "All you have to do is write it on your blog, send the link to whomever and the letter is done!" So there you have it, on days I am writing letters in my head of thanks. (or the occasional letter for anger) I will simply post here.

My first letter I would like to dedicate to Mr. Willie Nelson.


Dear Mr. Willie Nelson,


I am sure you hear this a lot, but I thought it was important for me to write to you. Your latest cd Songbird is so absolutely wonderful. It has moved me to tears many times over. Tears of joy.

I cannot stop listening to it. For a month straight I think I have listened to it everyday. The title song is my favorite. I think I listen to it at least 3-5 times per day. I can't stop. Hearing it, I fall in love with my husband all over again. Thank you a million times over for this beautiful song. Thank you for all the music you have played over the years.

Love,

Roberta

Surprise! I really love work...

It is true, I really love being back at work. What I don't love is a miscommunication between myself and my supervisor at my new job. They are big ones too.

1. if I work a Sat. I thought I would get a day off, not true-Sat. hours are from 10-2 I still have to work half a day on Friday and get the rest of the day off. This is sort of ok, but not what I thought I signed up for. I prefer full day Saturday, with another whole day during the week off.

2. I have to work one night a week from 11-9pm. There are major daycare issues here. I have to now find someone to pick the kids up from 6pm until my husband gets home at 6:45. This blows. It is bad enough they are in daycare all day long, now I won't get to see them when I get home. (They are supposed to be in bed by 8:30-9pm)

I dunno what to do here. I really want to work for planned parenthood, I like my immediate supervisor a lot, but I am not thrilled with all this info that I didn't know I was signing on for. I
really don't know what to do. Any suggestions?

1, 2, 3 YOU'RE OUT!

So hopefully Planned Parenthood is down with Momsrising.org and they aren't going to fire me for missing a day of work in my first week there. They just eliminated their archaic policy of 6 months and no vacation or sick leave down to 3 months so no pay today.

Holy crap things went from bad to worse. Not to mention the daycares three strikes and your out policy-that is to say three diarrhea diapers and momma gets a phone call. My kids been pooping out the wet stuff about 5 times per day, each one requiring a change of clothing. That new huggies leak lock just doesn't lock his technicolor stank in! My husband had to go to work today - he has been taking care of the kids since Monday. The plan was for us both to go to work today and my sons to go to "school". Suddenly last night my oldest developed an asthma like response to the cold air and I was up all night with him/listening/watching/praying. I stayed home to take him to the Dr. get a nebulizer treatment and bring the damn thing home to start round the clock albuterol treatments. (He thought that meant "treat" not treatment so at first he was psyched than he screamed than I caved and gave in to m&m's post nebulizer...) Thankfully he is doing much better but, the baby just keeps poopin'!

Luckily my mom is coming tomorrow to watch my 3yr old and I am dosing my baby with his iron vitamins tonight and tomorrow to keep the three strikes and your out policy down to a possible 1 giant explosion. (Iron is a well known constipator) I know that sounds kind of cruel, but ya gotta do what ya gotta do. I can't ask my mom to watch the two of them! I need to find a babysitter. Anyone out there know how to find a reliable babysitter besides hiring a potential serial killer from craigs list?

drowning in puke and poop

So, I go back to work and what happens? The shit hits the fan - literally. The baby just stopped puking-projectile vomiting really on Sunday-when his brother decides it is his turn to start on Monday. The baby in sympathy really (I am guessing here) starts back up w/ the projectile puke. Suddenly I am running to the bathroom. I am cold, cramping -oh yes of course I am getting my period on top of everything else. The next morning-Tuesday I am supposed to go to work. I drag myself out of bed, shower and start getting ready realizing that I now hear my husband vomiting in the bathroom next to me.

Some people have parties, some go to music festivals we have puke festivals. I had to leave work early (only my second day) to come home and take care of my kids, because my husband could barely move. He is on the couch now moaning to god something about the "kiss of death" which really is his breath if you think about it. Oh roto virus why can't they find a cure for you???

Too bad I can't just "Shake my moneymaker..."

Wishing I could just Shake My Money Maker

Soon my life will be catapulted back into the working world. I am thankful for the time I have spent with my family-but sad that it must end so soon. I hope I can survive the chaos that will come starting Monday am. I am trying hard to organize the family so that things won't be to hectic. I hope soon I won't be treading water in day to day life, not realizing that I am just an inch away from drowning.

I hope that this break will give me the insight I need to keep myself and my family afloat. I hope that soon I won't be viewing life as if I am about to be swept out to sea, but instead full of constant joy, expressions of love and utter happiness. What more could I ask for? As my children teach me to smile more, and as my husband continues to grin at my silly/sick humor-I can only hope that there will always be a sense of joy in my heart.

I can't forget to thank Elmore James for this inspirational song...
Elmore James, Shake Your Money Maker

15 minutes to post

I went for a beautiful hike in Harriman State Park today. It was gorgeous. The woods were lit up by sunlight. Because of all the rain we are getting it almost smelled like spring. The streams and brooks were full and running softly over the rocks. I went alone, which was great. I wasn't scared and felt terrific pressing my hands up against some ancient silver birch trees and watching the skies for bird life. What a pleasant surprise 50 degree weather in January. I am so glad I live close to the park, it was one of the reasons I agreed to move up here. (It certainly wasn't for our lovely strip mall....)

Time to go soon, gotta get the kids, make dinner, finish laundry-what is up with laundry does it ever end? and .... anything else? not sure I am not sure. oh, go to the library and return the fabulous Maurice Sendak book- In the Night Kitchen. My son loves to point out that Mikey is naked and say-"mommy, that's his tushaay" He pronounces tush like he is from the south. He loves the book so much he has it practically memorized. We also had to pick him up his own copy. So many thanks to you Mr. Sendak for your lovely writing. I grew up on his books and plan to give my boys the same enjoyment.

working mamma blues

I am getting ready to go back to work....sigh. January 8th is my official return to the workforce date. While I am very excited I am also sad. My 3 yr old said to me "mommy I have a secret...I don't want you to go back to work, I will miss you." I almost cried. I explained to him that I have to work and that it is important. Still, I wish I didn't have to work so much. At least now my commute will only be 15 min. from home and about the same from the daycare. I think it will be an ok adjustment.

That being said I am now scrambling to finish all the things I need to get done before I get back to work:
1. put the pictures of the baby in his photo album-first 15 months of life
2. put family pictures from the past 17months in a photo album
3. order the above pictures from kodak
4. get the letter written for the book I wrote
5. pick a publisher for the book I wrote
6. print out the book I wrote and send it to a publisher
7. have lots of sex before I am too exhausted from working

I wrote a children's book that I am really excited about, but that I haven't had the chance to finish up and send out. I really want to do this because ever since I was a kid all I ever wanted to do was write a book (besides being the first female president of the US, a marine biologist and a nature photographer for national geographic...)

Tomorrow we are going to the American Museum of National History in NYC. So that means I have wed, thurs, and friday to get all the above done before I become workforce woman all over again.

51$ later....

I decided to meet my cousin and her daughter in the city for a fun day at the museum of natural history on Thursday. The boys and I got into the car early in the am and drove in. Imagine my surprise at finding the supremo parking spot, right in front of a parking garage in NYC. I was thrilled! I got the boys out and into the stroller, called my cousin who was around the corner and looked up to see a street sweeping sign. Sure enough, I parked where the street sweepers were headed. I had to wait for my cousin before I could drive the car right into the lot where the rates were SURPRISE astronomical. 3 1/2 hrs later I was stuck w/ a $51 bill for parking!

Now let me say this, I had a phenomenal time. So, in the end although I had to pay a lot I was so happy to be out, walking in Central Park, going on the carousel and just having fun outdoors with the kids and family that it was TOTALLY WORTH IT. That being said, next time I drive into NYC I will pay better attention to the street signs. I mean look at it this way, at least I didn't get a $150 parking ticket or worse TOWED.

We didn't go into the museum because it was so packed I got claustrophobic just looking at it. Instead we walked around outside and were better for it. I think it would have been a bit much. We forgot about holiday tourist season, plus kids being out of school adds up to a huge nightmare for people who can got to the museum on a more regular basis. Next week we will try again....

Whose got the Mutz with the Most?

I was so sick over Christmas that I didn't get to celebrate! I was so looking forward to my mother-in-laws meatballs, my sister-in-laws lasagna, my husbands mutz platter and cutting up an anti-pasta platter (food mostly provided by the in-laws who didn't want us to spend tons of money on the good stuff). Bummer. I can't even utter the words provolone or supprasatte without wanting to hurl. Oh well. I guess I will have to wait until the next time....So that is the post, five pounds lighter, starving, but no longer exploding. Life is good! At least I got to see my sister, her husband and the kids again before the long haul to New Olreans from NY.

Oh and if you don't know how to explain the crappy gift to your kid you know the one you bought on line and didn't realize would suck ass-well I told mine that every year Santa drops off a lemon. That's right a lemon. An accidental elfin mistake. Worked like a charm. Feel free to use it.

43 things

I was going to work on a list for my 2007 resolutions. Instead my friend directed my to this site called 43 things I really like it a lot. It shows you with other people all over the world who are interested in doing the same things as you, plus it will set up an email reminder to let you know that you wanted to do a certain thing. Like mine is set up in a month to remind me about how badly I love to kayak, and how I want to start doing more of it next year.

You can cheer on other people, update your info, post to your blog (this isn't working for me in beta blogger for some reason) and just kind keep tabs on your list. If you are like me and don't really do a list b.c. you know you are a. not going to ever find the list, or b. too lazy to write one and think your memory is good enough to remember everything than I think this is the site for you. Check it out, it can't hurt!

The Wire

I must confess I love this show . The Wire on HBO is so good and disturbing and stressful. After I watch an episode I lay in bed eyes open trying to decipher all that I have seen. Is this real? Is this true to life? The agonizing violence and harsh reality of child neglect on the show zaps me in a way where my mind reels for hours afterwards. The cast is amazing, especially the kids. I am constantly blown away by them. The show is supposedly showing the gritty reality of Baltimore. I hope it is less realistic than exposed here.

Sometimes it is hard to hear the dialogue, especially when the baby starts fussing and I miss key comments. I think every word spoken on the show has meaning. It is one of those shows where you really can't miss a thing, you have to pay attention to all the details whether they are minor or not. Howard "Bunny" Colvin played by Robert Wisdom and Namond Brice played by Julito McCullum are my two current favorite actors on the show. I can't really say that though, I think all the actors on the show are really brilliant in their performances. Shakima Greggs played by Sonja Sohn is also amazing, but she seems to be less present lately. I have been watching since the first season and the turns that the show has taken are pretty drastic. All directions however are linked and I guess I can't say enough. I just wish I wouldn't stay up so late and watch it, b.c. I simply can't fall asleep afterwards.

Goodbye Chanukah, Hello Christmas!

Well things are finally getting back to some type of normal here, and I have had a chance to read my email. I checked out a note I received from MomsRising.org. It is an article the Joan Blades wrote about at the Huffington post regarding the need for social change in how we look at motherhood in the US. The post is called: Should Society Support Mothers Raising Children? and it elicited 147 responses. Many of them so negative they could only be considered anti-mother. I was shocked to see how many people out there are angry about motherhood. I haven't had a chance to really check out her follow up called Indiscriminate Breeders!?! This has already received 84 responses. I am sure it is equally heated.

As a working mom and full-time at that, I know that I was very angry after going back to work when my first child was born. I was angry that we have a president who is all about "family values" but who I believe doesn't support family values in the way I think is important. I mean, really I love working, belonging to a community and I enjoy being with my children. There has to be a better balance. Childcare needs to be more affordable. Work environment needs to be more "mom friendly". Life needs to be more fun and less stressful. I think Moms Rising is all about that and should be something we all check out. I mean where would we be without Mom? love her or hate her we wouldn't be here without her!


That being said, I also finally posted a new poem. I really would like to work on my poetry and creative writing more. Maybe I will post a list of goals? I hate those new year things, but it would be nice to do and check out in a year here. I mean I can't lose the paper if it is on a blog.

Tonight is the last night of Chanukah, and we will put up the Christmas lights and tree today. I enjoy celebrating both, and I am glad we didn't go crazy on the gifts this year. My husband and I went around the house and gathered up all the toys the kids are done with and sent them (the toys not the kids) to the Salvation Army. I also packed up the last of my maternity clothing and the baby clothing and sent that off to the clothing drop. We donated toys and money to toys for tots, I purchased bracelets from Invisible Children. To help support the children of Uganda and to give my nephew and nieces something that I think is important a gift that symbolizes helping others around the world. I also donated money to the local food bank. All this on my unemployment credit card. Thankfully that has been quite helpful this holiday season. I think if I didn't get the benefits we wouldn't be having this type of holiday.

Okay enough said, back to housecleaning, and maybe finally putting my photo album for the baby together, I mean he is only 15 months old. Don't you think it is about time???

Happy Holidays!

WOO HOO I GOT A JOB!!!

Well, it has been a long time since I posted. Things have been a bit crazy on the home front. With personal family issues, and job hunting taking up most of my time. It is nice to finally get a moment to post and catch up on the writing. I have been listening to the Songbird CD by Willie Nelson and I can't get enough of it, plus the Neko CD I posted about awhile ago. The train song really is amazing.

I will not be posting about the family crisis shit, b.c. it is too personal. Suffice to say-we remain an intact unit and we will be fine. That being said I did get a job offer that I am very excited about. I will be working for one of my favorite organizations: Planned Parenthood! They are truly a great organization to work for, primarily because of the good work they do in the community. This is really wonderful news for me.

My sister is in town from New Orleans and the house is full of four boys running around. Two 3 yr olds and two 1 year olds. They are having a blast together and it is really nice to have them here. We are celebrating for the holidays. That is all for today. I haven't written a poem in ages either, that has gotten more difficult as my "real world" has collided a bit too dramatically with my "off work world".

I Hate Car Seats!!! F*&@! you LATCH SYSTEM!!!

Ok, so this is really a dramatic title, but I just realized after 3 years that I have been putting in the car seats all wrong. I finally noticed the very small writing on the britax latch system that the stupid things are supposed to be on a specific side of the car, not just any side. This wasn't in the installation booklet so imagine my surprise at reading it. I kept wondering why it was so difficult for me to loosen straps, but it was because I kept getting everything twisted. Guess what it also is super easy to move one latch over to the other side and you don't even have to loosen any straps or anything.

So have I put my kids in danger all this time when I thought I was being safe? . Well I finally took they time out to focus on my children's safety and fixed the situation. I was supposed to take it to the cops for them to help me out, but I never got a chance, plus some cops just make me nervous. Maybe it is because I was arrested once...who knows. (Not you Jeff-you are the best!) I was also trying to take the car seats to the local hospital for installation, but I never got a call back. Anyway, I guess we can all be a little "Britney Spears" when it comes to car seats.

I LOVE WILLIE NELSON!!!

Willie Nelson is amazing. His latest CD Songbird was released 10/31/06 (my last day of work) by Lost Highway Records. It is absolutely fabulous. His version of Stella Blue
is so moving. His voice strong yet wavering is still a sweet sweet sound. I haven't listened to a tons of Willie Nelsons music over the years, yet I have always been a fan. I love when he and Johnny Cash did songs together. This however is by far the best CD I have heard in a long time by any artist. I truly recommend this recording for any music fan. He is a true national treasure and we are blessed just to have his voice and music recorded so beautifully.

Much love to Willie - Here is to you and your beautiful voice!


interviewing is exhausting:


The interview went GREAT. Next follow up interview is this coming week. I had to quickly run up to the outlets to buy another top for my follow up interview. I am so psyched! On another note, the unemployment $$ seems to be dipping rather quick. I am down to $24 on the card. No wonder when I wanted to take out 60$ I was REJECTED. Nothing else to say, oh except the Rabbi busted on NBC to Catch a Predator was busted for being a pedophile and I think is getting 6 years in jail. PIG! I don't feel sorry for him, just his family. I know I know we should forgive all, but this guy should've known better. When just read my earlier post and you will see how I feel.

Burnt Chicken and Other Stories from the Homefront

I need to post, I am probably burning the chicken in the oven, but I NEED TO POST. This is like an addiction or something. The baby is asleep in the highchair-that's right the highchair. Not strapped in because the straps are broken. My other son is eating brown rice and lentils alone watching "Little Bear" on noggin. He doesn't want the chicken. I will not repeat that line, you can read it yourself. I know I left him alone with the TV. I hate the TV, but shit it is like a mini saviour just when you or your child needs to be saved.

What crazy things have happened this week? I ventured out into the shopping world with my workforce unemployment benefits card and made quite a few purchases. Spent a ton of $$ on BRAS it has been like 7 years since I bought a bra so imagine my surprise at how big my boobs are and how a good bra makes them saggy baggies look good again! It was worth the cash. I went to the dread toys R hideous toystore and was tortured into buying things-at least I donated some money to Toys for Tots. I felt better for doing that. Oh I also experienced the waky world of Michaels. That store that sells craft supplies and Christmas decorations. I wanted to make my son a big bucket of craft stuff for a gift b.c. he likes googly eyes, feathers and other messy stuff. They over charged me for an item by almost 9 bucks so I had to go back and deal. Besides waiting on line I had a weird interaction with a person I thought was normal. For some reason the transaction took about 20 minutes, because she thought when I said "cash back" I meant Michael's Gift Card. I don't plan on ever going back there again, and I am not quite sure why she thought cash is the same as a gift card. The manager was pissed, she had to come over about 5 times and wouldn't even acknowledge my "thank you" to her. Ah the holidays are here~!

I also argued with the grumpy librarian over a dollar I know I returned that stupid Diego dvd about dinosaurs on time!

Went food shopping and well it goes like this, I finally get to put half my food onto the belt when my son pops his head out of the little car for the cart and says "mommy I have to go potty" Under my breath, but loud enough for adults to hear I said "FUCK!" That is pretty bad to say in the A&P it just slipped out I swear1 I threw the food into the cart and ran as fast as I could to the bathroom. We made it in time. I managed to keep the baby from touching anything and washed my older sons hands. A miracle. On the way out I complained to customer service that I can't afford to buy my milk at the A&P because the hormone free stuff is too expensive. The lady didn't care, but said she'd ask the manager for me regarding Tuscan milk, its cheaper than Horizon and doesn't have the hormones in it. Horizon has the nerve to charge over 5 bucks for 3/4 of a gallon of milk. Nervy wipes, I wish we could afford that, but not even with unemployment benefits is it worthy of a purchase. And whats with the 3/4 of a gallon deal, what a scam!

I just read that people are sick from eating at taco bell-not a surprise. I mean it is taco bell. But what the hell is going on around here. We are dying from spinach and refried beans because of e. coli? nasty poop bacteria. I mean why is it IN OUR FOOD SUPPLY. Is it just me or does it seem like this is happening more often?

I have an interview tomorrow that I am psyched about. I hope I will be prepared. I need sleep and shower and well it would be nice if I could put some makeup on before I left the house. We shall see.