Saturday, September 29, 2007

Financial Rollercoaster Race

You know, when I first started this blog I thought it would be an amazing creative outlet for me. I thought perhaps I would actually write more, be humorous and that I would gather an interesting collective of people who liked what I wrote. Instead, it has turned into a sporadic posting site. I can't even look at other peoples blogs and comment.

My life is that crazy. I don't work out, I don't write. All I do is work, take care of the kids and sleep. I am not really sure how other people are managing this? I have written about this before, but I haven' t really come to any great understanding as to how I am supposed to cope with it. I feel I am open to change and I am asking myself and the universe to allow for change in a positive way. Still I feel stuck. I feel upside down. I feel not myself. I feel like a parent caught in a financial roller coaster race that I am destined to fall out of again and again. How do I keep my act together under these situations? I don't know how to save more money, I don't know how to make more money and I am not sure if that is even the answer. Really, I want to work three days a week and spend more time with my kids. I love them so much and I hate how my day is so rushed with them. I feel like we have to just move move move all the time during the week. By the weekend we are trying to catch up with laundry, cleaning, cooking, sleep and grocery shopping. Where is the time for fun? We do work really hard at having fun on both sat. and sun. but it takes its toll on my husband and I.

I miss my friends, I miss having energy, I miss feeling well slept, I miss a lot. But I wonder who are these women who have the time to blog? Do they work? Do they have nannies? How are the rest of the populations surviving that are in a situation like mine?

I really wish that I could change the life we live write now, to have more time for family and friends. I need to spend less time worrying about work and money!

2 comments:

Jennifer said...

Keeping a blog does one other thing... it exposes you to the world.

Swear to god I'm not trying to dredge anything up here. Just wanted to say hi and congrats on the family. I'm married too and working on the kid thing. There are pictures...

http://jlabeatnik.livejournal.com/
http://www.myspace.com/bgdbeatnik

Drop me a line if you feel so inclined. Hug.

Jennifer

SFSweetness said...

this may be corny, California new-age speak, but you'd be surprised what can happen if you just hold the vision of how you want things to be and take little steps towards it. I ended up with a whole new life in a few months!